August 4, 2006
The Wisdom of Solomon
Two rednecks walked into town from their farms one day to buy a couple of pigs.
On the way home, the first redneck reckneck said to his friend, "how will we know which pig is mine and which is yours?"
His friend pondered, then replied, "we could cut the left ear off your pig, then we'll be able to tell them apart".
The man thought about this for a while then agreed. So, they cut the left ear off the man's pig.
After a bit, the two pigs began fighting and the one-eared pig bit the left ear off the other pig.
This posed the problem again, so they decided to cut the right ear off one of the pigs so they would know which pig was which.
After a time, the pigs fought again and yes, the earless pig bit the right ear off the other pig.
Not knowing what to do, they discussed cutting one of the pigs tails off. Agreed. Again, the pigs fought and both ended up tailless.
Then, the second redneck suggested they cut one of the pigs hind legs off.
Finally after much thought, the first redneck said, "That is just too inhumane. How about we say the black pig is yours and the white one is mine....”
New Medical study
A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with a spear lodged in his forehead and tape over his mouth while he is on fire.No further studies are expected.
Why are you so sad?
A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Sam proposed to me an hour ago,"
"Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked.
"Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell,"
Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we’ll show him how wrong he is."
THE PREACHER'S SON
An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. Like many young men, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it.
One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table three objects: a Bible, a silver dollar, and a bottle of whisky.
"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up. If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be! If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too. But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be."
The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. He tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.
Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink.
"Lord have mercy," the old man whispered, "he's gonna be a Congressman!
Waitress Gets Own ID When Carding PatronAug 01 WESTLAKE, Ohio- A bar waitress checking to see if a woman was legally old enough to drink was handed her own stolen driver's license, which was reported missing weeks earlier, police said.
…The woman, who became suspicious of the delay as the waitress went to call police, fled the Moosehead Saloon, but her companion provided her name.
The victim also had a credit card stolen. The stolen card has been used to make $1,000 in purchases, Turner said. http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/08/01/D8J7JPCO3.html
Sounds like an oxymoron to me...
Theme park calls off "Muslim Fun Day"
Aug 2, 2006 LONDON - Britain's biggest theme park has called off the country's first "National Muslim Fun Day" because of lack of interest, the park said Wednesday.
Alton Towers in central England was to open on September 17 for Muslims -- with halal food, a strict dress code and prayer areas.
Music, gambling and alcohol were to be banned for the day and theme park rides such as "Ripsaw," "Corkscrew" and "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" all segregated by sex.
But the park said the event's organizers, Islamic Leisure, who rented the park for the day and were marketing the event, had called it off due to "insufficient ticket sales."
"Alton Towers is disappointed that the planned Family Fun Day Sunday 17th September has had to be canceled," the park said in a statement. A park spokeswoman said Islamic Leisure would refund those who bought tickets.
Islamic Leisure's phones were not being answered on Wednesday.
Organizers had hoped to fill a niche for Britain's 1.7 million Muslims, some of whom may be uncomfortable with mainstream entertainment.
But the fun day had caused some consternation: a non-Muslim couple scheduled to hold their wedding at the park's hotel complained to newspapers that event organizers told them the bride and female guests would have to cover up. (and not ride the rides together)
The park promised the party would be exempt from the rules (yeah, at their peril). A park spokeswoman said the wedding would take place as planned.
http://today.reuters.com/news/newsarticle.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyid=2006-08-02T184048Z_01_L02862061_RTRUKOC_0_US-MUSLIMS-FUNDAY.xml&src=rss&rpc=22
Schools told it's no longer necessary to teach right from wrong
ENGLAND July 31, 2006 -SCHOOLS no longer required to teach children the difference between right and wrong under plans to revise the core aims of the National Curriculum.
Instead, under a new wording that reflects a world of relative rather than absolute values, teachers would be asked to encourage pupils to develop “secure values and beliefs”.
The draft also purges references to promoting leadership skills and deletes the requirement to teach children about Britain’s cultural heritage.
...In citizenship classes, teachers ask pupils to discuss issues such as whether it is ever right to pass on information received in confidence and situations such as what they would do if they saw someone writing graffiti on a bus; heard friends talking about stealing; found a wallet full of cash; or saw people fighting...
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,591-2292741,00.html
Nikolayevich "Leo" Tolstoy (1828-1910)
"To sin is a human business; to justify sin is a devilish business"--
A great web site to debunk the anti-gun crowd: http://www.guncite.com
Global warming, 1948 style [Iain Murray]
A scientist friend discovered an article from 1948 entitled "The Present Climatic Fluctuation." Written by Professor Hans Ahlmann of the University of Stockholm, it begins:
The present climatic fluctuation has been discussed since the 1920's almost exclusively in scientific circles, although it has recently become a subject of more than academic interest...Ordinary people are beginning to realize that something has happened and is happening which is of great interest to themselves. The last dry summer, which transformed large parts of Western Europe into a virtual steppe, increased this interest and also caused anxiety, though this drought cannot be said with any certainty to belong to the present climatic fluctuation.
Sound familiar? All that is missing is a documentary by Thomas E Dewey on the subject.
Anyway, Ahlmann documents rapidly rising temperatures, glaciers melting like crazy, atmospheric circulation changes, species shifting, sea level rise, and so on from all around the world. But he concludes:
If we find in the Antarctic similar evidence of the present climatic fluctuation as has been found in other parts of the world, we shall be justified in concluding that the present fluctuation is a world-wide phenomenon and probably the result of variations in solar activity which, slow as they may be to take effect, are actually resulting in an improvement in the climate of our world.
http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=YmI1M2I4MDk3ZWI1YWIyNTA5MzQ0ZThhMmE0ODE4NTA=
In the next article the key word is "propose." In the unlikely event it actually passes I doubt if it is enforced...
Pakistan to Propose Changing Rape Laws
8/1/2006 ISLAMABAD, Pakistan The government will propose amending Pakistan's rape laws to remove the nearly impossible burden of proof on victims and to protect them from retaliatory charges of adultery, a ruling party lawmaker said Tuesday.
The draft legislation likely will be submitted soon to the National Assembly, the lower house of Parliament, said Mahnaz Rafi, chairwoman for Parliament's special committee for women's development. Parties supporting President Gen. Pervez Musharraf have enough votes to pass the bill.
...Under Islamic law adopted by Pakistan in 1979, a woman must produce four Muslim witnesses to prove she was raped.
The proposal would end that requirement and increase the burden of proof on a person accusing a woman of adultery. Currently, a woman who claims she was raped but fails to prove her case can be convicted of adultery or having sex outside marriage.
...Pakistan has two parallel and sometimes overlapping legal systems _ one based on British common law and another based on Islamic law.
Under Islamic, or Shariah, law, women can be sentenced to death by stoning if found guilty of having sex outside of marriage, although the usual sentence is life in prison.
An outcry from rape victim Mukhtar Mai has helped bring international attention to the treatment of women in Pakistan. Mai, who traveled to the United States last year, was gang-raped at the orders of a tribal council as punishment for her 13-year-old brother's alleged affair with a woman from a higher caste.
http://www.happynews.com/news/812006/pakistan-propose-changing-rape-laws.htm
The next article makes it sound like a small isolated problem. This has been a problem in parks everywhere I have ever lived. And it's not usually kids or a man and woman but 99% it's either homosexuals or pedophiles. A few weeks ago there was bust at the Wheeler Wildlife Refuge where they nabbed a bunch of homos in the act. One was 82 years old.
Lewd Litter Spoils Some Spokane Parks
Jul 31 SPOKANE, Wash.Litter from sexual activity is unpleasantly evident in High Bridge and People's parks, reflecting years of lewd conduct in the open air, police and park officials say.
Discarded underwear, lubrication packets and condoms are regularly found in the bushes, and Officer Jennifer DeRuwe says police have received a growing number of complaints.
…A 22-year-old park worker who asked not to be named out of fear for his safety and his $11-an-hour position said that in two months on the job, he has been propositioned, has seen evidence of public sexual activity and now warns unwary visitors attracted by a new disc golf course and a new bicycle trail link.
"I tell them, 'Don't let your kids go in there,'" he said.
Supervisors have advised the worker to wear clothing identifying him as a parks employee, said Tony Madunich, assistant parks and recreation manager.
Julie Graham, spokeswoman for the Spokane Regional Health District, said the problem has not posed any special public health concerns.
City Council member Bob Apple said police are stretched thin. "I would rather they show up to the burglary or the probable theft than to an instance of consensual sex in a public place," Apple said. "I, like most people, find it disgusting _ but what do you do?" You enforce the law and resulting penalties you moron!!!http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/07/31/D8J7A0D80.html
Mom Tracks Down Toilet-Tissue Pranksters
Jul 31 NORCO, Calif.-Teenagers who toilet-papered and damaged a home now face felony vandalism charges because of a mother's extraordinary sleuthing.
Katja Base, mother of six, was unwilling to let the teens get away with it, saying she tracked them down to teach her kids about accountability.
Base awoke one February morning to find her front lawn strewn in white two-ply toilet paper. She and husband Ken also found damaged landscaping and light fixtures as well as ruined finishes on two cars.
Dog food and flour also covered the lawn.
Realizing the sheriff's department has better things to do than track down teen pranksters, Katja Base decided to do some detective work.
…Base persuaded supermarket managers to tally daily toilet-paper buys for the week and a Stater Bros. manager said there was a run on bathroom tissue two days before her home was vandalized.
At 7:30 p.m. Feb. 17, someone bought 144 rolls of toilet paper, cheese, dog food, flour and plastic forks, the same items found on her lawn and house. It was a cash transaction, making it difficult to trace the purchaser, but the store had video surveillance.
The video showed four teenagers making the purchase, one of them wearing a Norco High School letterman's jacket with a name stitched across the back. The store's parking lot surveillance camera showed the truck they were using.
Base then borrowed a Norco High yearbook and used online databases to get the name, phone numbers and addresses of the teens on the store tape.
The information was eventually sent to the district attorney's office and prosecutors confirmed that about six youths were now facing vandalism charges.
http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/07/31/D8J7BQ4O3.html
David Bennett <><
http://freewill-predestination.com
http://www.knology.net/~lonesomedove
Two rednecks walked into town from their farms one day to buy a couple of pigs.
On the way home, the first redneck reckneck said to his friend, "how will we know which pig is mine and which is yours?"
His friend pondered, then replied, "we could cut the left ear off your pig, then we'll be able to tell them apart".
The man thought about this for a while then agreed. So, they cut the left ear off the man's pig.
After a bit, the two pigs began fighting and the one-eared pig bit the left ear off the other pig.
This posed the problem again, so they decided to cut the right ear off one of the pigs so they would know which pig was which.
After a time, the pigs fought again and yes, the earless pig bit the right ear off the other pig.
Not knowing what to do, they discussed cutting one of the pigs tails off. Agreed. Again, the pigs fought and both ended up tailless.
Then, the second redneck suggested they cut one of the pigs hind legs off.
Finally after much thought, the first redneck said, "That is just too inhumane. How about we say the black pig is yours and the white one is mine....”
New Medical study
A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with a spear lodged in his forehead and tape over his mouth while he is on fire.No further studies are expected.
Why are you so sad?
A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Sam proposed to me an hour ago,"
"Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked.
"Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell,"
Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we’ll show him how wrong he is."
THE PREACHER'S SON
An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. Like many young men, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it.
One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table three objects: a Bible, a silver dollar, and a bottle of whisky.
"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up. If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be! If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too. But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be."
The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. He tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.
Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink.
"Lord have mercy," the old man whispered, "he's gonna be a Congressman!
Waitress Gets Own ID When Carding PatronAug 01 WESTLAKE, Ohio- A bar waitress checking to see if a woman was legally old enough to drink was handed her own stolen driver's license, which was reported missing weeks earlier, police said.
…The woman, who became suspicious of the delay as the waitress went to call police, fled the Moosehead Saloon, but her companion provided her name.
The victim also had a credit card stolen. The stolen card has been used to make $1,000 in purchases, Turner said. http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/08/01/D8J7JPCO3.html
Sounds like an oxymoron to me...
Theme park calls off "Muslim Fun Day"
Aug 2, 2006 LONDON - Britain's biggest theme park has called off the country's first "National Muslim Fun Day" because of lack of interest, the park said Wednesday.
Alton Towers in central England was to open on September 17 for Muslims -- with halal food, a strict dress code and prayer areas.
Music, gambling and alcohol were to be banned for the day and theme park rides such as "Ripsaw," "Corkscrew" and "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" all segregated by sex.
But the park said the event's organizers, Islamic Leisure, who rented the park for the day and were marketing the event, had called it off due to "insufficient ticket sales."
"Alton Towers is disappointed that the planned Family Fun Day Sunday 17th September has had to be canceled," the park said in a statement. A park spokeswoman said Islamic Leisure would refund those who bought tickets.
Islamic Leisure's phones were not being answered on Wednesday.
Organizers had hoped to fill a niche for Britain's 1.7 million Muslims, some of whom may be uncomfortable with mainstream entertainment.
But the fun day had caused some consternation: a non-Muslim couple scheduled to hold their wedding at the park's hotel complained to newspapers that event organizers told them the bride and female guests would have to cover up. (and not ride the rides together)
The park promised the party would be exempt from the rules (yeah, at their peril). A park spokeswoman said the wedding would take place as planned.
http://today.reuters.com/news/newsarticle.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyid=2006-08-02T184048Z_01_L02862061_RTRUKOC_0_US-MUSLIMS-FUNDAY.xml&src=rss&rpc=22
Schools told it's no longer necessary to teach right from wrong
ENGLAND July 31, 2006 -SCHOOLS no longer required to teach children the difference between right and wrong under plans to revise the core aims of the National Curriculum.
Instead, under a new wording that reflects a world of relative rather than absolute values, teachers would be asked to encourage pupils to develop “secure values and beliefs”.
The draft also purges references to promoting leadership skills and deletes the requirement to teach children about Britain’s cultural heritage.
...In citizenship classes, teachers ask pupils to discuss issues such as whether it is ever right to pass on information received in confidence and situations such as what they would do if they saw someone writing graffiti on a bus; heard friends talking about stealing; found a wallet full of cash; or saw people fighting...
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,591-2292741,00.html
Nikolayevich "Leo" Tolstoy (1828-1910)
"To sin is a human business; to justify sin is a devilish business"--
A great web site to debunk the anti-gun crowd: http://www.guncite.com
Global warming, 1948 style [Iain Murray]
A scientist friend discovered an article from 1948 entitled "The Present Climatic Fluctuation." Written by Professor Hans Ahlmann of the University of Stockholm, it begins:
The present climatic fluctuation has been discussed since the 1920's almost exclusively in scientific circles, although it has recently become a subject of more than academic interest...Ordinary people are beginning to realize that something has happened and is happening which is of great interest to themselves. The last dry summer, which transformed large parts of Western Europe into a virtual steppe, increased this interest and also caused anxiety, though this drought cannot be said with any certainty to belong to the present climatic fluctuation.
Sound familiar? All that is missing is a documentary by Thomas E Dewey on the subject.
Anyway, Ahlmann documents rapidly rising temperatures, glaciers melting like crazy, atmospheric circulation changes, species shifting, sea level rise, and so on from all around the world. But he concludes:
If we find in the Antarctic similar evidence of the present climatic fluctuation as has been found in other parts of the world, we shall be justified in concluding that the present fluctuation is a world-wide phenomenon and probably the result of variations in solar activity which, slow as they may be to take effect, are actually resulting in an improvement in the climate of our world.
http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=YmI1M2I4MDk3ZWI1YWIyNTA5MzQ0ZThhMmE0ODE4NTA=
In the next article the key word is "propose." In the unlikely event it actually passes I doubt if it is enforced...
Pakistan to Propose Changing Rape Laws
8/1/2006 ISLAMABAD, Pakistan The government will propose amending Pakistan's rape laws to remove the nearly impossible burden of proof on victims and to protect them from retaliatory charges of adultery, a ruling party lawmaker said Tuesday.
The draft legislation likely will be submitted soon to the National Assembly, the lower house of Parliament, said Mahnaz Rafi, chairwoman for Parliament's special committee for women's development. Parties supporting President Gen. Pervez Musharraf have enough votes to pass the bill.
...Under Islamic law adopted by Pakistan in 1979, a woman must produce four Muslim witnesses to prove she was raped.
The proposal would end that requirement and increase the burden of proof on a person accusing a woman of adultery. Currently, a woman who claims she was raped but fails to prove her case can be convicted of adultery or having sex outside marriage.
...Pakistan has two parallel and sometimes overlapping legal systems _ one based on British common law and another based on Islamic law.
Under Islamic, or Shariah, law, women can be sentenced to death by stoning if found guilty of having sex outside of marriage, although the usual sentence is life in prison.
An outcry from rape victim Mukhtar Mai has helped bring international attention to the treatment of women in Pakistan. Mai, who traveled to the United States last year, was gang-raped at the orders of a tribal council as punishment for her 13-year-old brother's alleged affair with a woman from a higher caste.
http://www.happynews.com/news/812006/pakistan-propose-changing-rape-laws.htm
The next article makes it sound like a small isolated problem. This has been a problem in parks everywhere I have ever lived. And it's not usually kids or a man and woman but 99% it's either homosexuals or pedophiles. A few weeks ago there was bust at the Wheeler Wildlife Refuge where they nabbed a bunch of homos in the act. One was 82 years old.
Lewd Litter Spoils Some Spokane Parks
Jul 31 SPOKANE, Wash.Litter from sexual activity is unpleasantly evident in High Bridge and People's parks, reflecting years of lewd conduct in the open air, police and park officials say.
Discarded underwear, lubrication packets and condoms are regularly found in the bushes, and Officer Jennifer DeRuwe says police have received a growing number of complaints.
…A 22-year-old park worker who asked not to be named out of fear for his safety and his $11-an-hour position said that in two months on the job, he has been propositioned, has seen evidence of public sexual activity and now warns unwary visitors attracted by a new disc golf course and a new bicycle trail link.
"I tell them, 'Don't let your kids go in there,'" he said.
Supervisors have advised the worker to wear clothing identifying him as a parks employee, said Tony Madunich, assistant parks and recreation manager.
Julie Graham, spokeswoman for the Spokane Regional Health District, said the problem has not posed any special public health concerns.
City Council member Bob Apple said police are stretched thin. "I would rather they show up to the burglary or the probable theft than to an instance of consensual sex in a public place," Apple said. "I, like most people, find it disgusting _ but what do you do?" You enforce the law and resulting penalties you moron!!!http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/07/31/D8J7A0D80.html
Mom Tracks Down Toilet-Tissue Pranksters
Jul 31 NORCO, Calif.-Teenagers who toilet-papered and damaged a home now face felony vandalism charges because of a mother's extraordinary sleuthing.
Katja Base, mother of six, was unwilling to let the teens get away with it, saying she tracked them down to teach her kids about accountability.
Base awoke one February morning to find her front lawn strewn in white two-ply toilet paper. She and husband Ken also found damaged landscaping and light fixtures as well as ruined finishes on two cars.
Dog food and flour also covered the lawn.
Realizing the sheriff's department has better things to do than track down teen pranksters, Katja Base decided to do some detective work.
…Base persuaded supermarket managers to tally daily toilet-paper buys for the week and a Stater Bros. manager said there was a run on bathroom tissue two days before her home was vandalized.
At 7:30 p.m. Feb. 17, someone bought 144 rolls of toilet paper, cheese, dog food, flour and plastic forks, the same items found on her lawn and house. It was a cash transaction, making it difficult to trace the purchaser, but the store had video surveillance.
The video showed four teenagers making the purchase, one of them wearing a Norco High School letterman's jacket with a name stitched across the back. The store's parking lot surveillance camera showed the truck they were using.
Base then borrowed a Norco High yearbook and used online databases to get the name, phone numbers and addresses of the teens on the store tape.
The information was eventually sent to the district attorney's office and prosecutors confirmed that about six youths were now facing vandalism charges.
http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/07/31/D8J7BQ4O3.html
David Bennett <><
http://freewill-predestination.com
http://www.knology.net/~lonesomedove
posted by David Bennett | 2:52 PM
<< Home