November 6, 2005
Ma & Pa go to church
Not long ago Ma and Pa were on their way home after services one Sunday:
"Do you think that Johnson girl is tinting her hair," inquired Ma.
"I didn't even see her," admitted Pa.
"And that dress old lady Davis was wearing," continued Ma, "Really, don't tell me you think that's the proper outfit for a woman of her age and position."
"I'm afraid I didn't notice that either," said Pa.
"Hum," snapped Ma, much offended, "You should pay more attention in church ..."
It Takes A Team
A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a Knoxville courtroom drama this week when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy had a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her.
When the Judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.
After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Tennessee football team, the Volunteers, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.
~~~~~~~
TO: Honorable Secretary of Agriculture, Washington, D.C.
…The legal precedent covering most government assemblies is the 1983 Supreme Court case of Marsh v. Chambers, where justices noted:
“In light of the unambiguous and unbroken history of more than 200 years, there can be no doubt that the practice of opening legislative sessions with prayer has become part of the fabric of our society. To invoke Divine guidance on a public body entrusted with making the laws is not, in these circumstances, an "establishment" of religion or a step toward establishment; it is simply a tolerable acknowledgment of beliefs widely held among the people of this country. As Justice Douglas observed, "[w]e are a religious people whose institutions presuppose a Supreme Being."
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=47228
Not long ago Ma and Pa were on their way home after services one Sunday:
"Do you think that Johnson girl is tinting her hair," inquired Ma.
"I didn't even see her," admitted Pa.
"And that dress old lady Davis was wearing," continued Ma, "Really, don't tell me you think that's the proper outfit for a woman of her age and position."
"I'm afraid I didn't notice that either," said Pa.
"Hum," snapped Ma, much offended, "You should pay more attention in church ..."
~~~~~~~
It Takes A Team
A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a Knoxville courtroom drama this week when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy had a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her.
When the Judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.
After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Tennessee football team, the Volunteers, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.
~~~~~~~
TO: Honorable Secretary of Agriculture, Washington, D.C.
Dear Sir,
My friend, Ed Peterson, over at Wells Iowa, received a check for $1,000 from the government for not raising hogs. So, I want to go into the "not raising hogs" business next year.
What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the best kind of farm not to raise hogs on, and what is the best breed of hogs not to raise? I want to be sure that I approach this endeavor in keeping with all governmental policies. I would prefer not to raise razorbacks, but if that is not a good breed not to raise, then I will just as gladly not raise Yorkshires or Durocs.
As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't raised.
My friend, Peterson, is very joyful about the future of the business. He has been raising hogs for twenty years or so, and the best he ever made on them was $422 in 1968, until this year when he got your check for $1000 for not raising hogs.
If I get $1000 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2000 for not raising 100 hogs? I plan to operate on a small scale at first, holding myself down to about 4000 hogs not raised, which will mean about $80,000 the first year.
Now another thing, these hogs I will not raise will not eat 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also pay farmers for not raising corn and wheat. Will I qualify for payments for not raising wheat and corn not to feed the 4000 hogs I am not going to raise?
Also, I am considering the "not milking cows" business, so send me any information you have on that too.
In view of these circumstances, you understand that I will be totally unemployed and plan to file for unemployment and food stamps. Be assured you will have my vote in the coming election.
Patriotically Yours,
Mr. Smith
P.S. Would you please notify me when you plan to distribute more free cheese.
~~~~~~~
Eccentric genius Einstein, smoked cigarette butts picked up off street
11/6/05 An insight into the eccentric life of Albert Einstein has been provided in a letter written by his favourite grandson...Bernhard Caesar Einstein, 75, who has never previously spoken about his relative, has recounted a string of anecdotes about the often bizarre life of the 20th century's greatest scientist.
…At one point, the younger Mr Einstein recalled, his grandfather resorted to collecting cigarette butts from the streets to circumvent his doctor's effort to stop him from smoking…
http://news.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2005/11/06/weins06.xml
Faulty Poll Faults Alito's Abortion Stance
Nov. 5, 2005 A new Gallup poll claims to have found that Americans won't support Judge Samuel Alito for confirmation to the Supreme Court if it becomes clear he'll be the fifth vote to overturn Roe v Wade...but a close check of Gallup's methodology suggests the poll's conclusions should be taken with a grain of salt...the survey's fine print notes that the results are based on telephone interviews with 603 adults nationwide, aged 18 and older.
Surveys of "adults" are notorious for yielding more liberal results than surveys of "registered voters." Surveys of "likely voters" tend to trend more conservative still - and are considered the most accurate predictors of election results…Since non-voting "adults" have opted out of the political process, they're really irrelevant. Their presence in any poll is likely to distort its findings - almost always in favor of the liberal candidate or issue at hand.
...Maybe that's why Gallup's survey also finds that a full 50 percent of "adults" surveyed would back a Democrat filibuster of Alito. We're guessing that an even higher percentage of non-voters in the poll's sample would support such a move.
http://newsmax.com/archives/ic/2005/11/5/120714.shtml
Archaeologists Discover Ancient Church
November 5, 2005 JERUSALEM -- Israeli archaeologists said Saturday they have discovered what may be the oldest Christian church in the Holy Land on the grounds of a prison near the biblical site of Armageddon.
The Israeli Antiquities Authority said the ruins are believed to date back to the third or fourth centuries and include references to Jesus and images of fish, an ancient Christian symbol.
"This is a very ancient structure, maybe the oldest in our area," said Yotam Tepper, the head archaeologist on the dig.
…Tepper said the discovery could reveal more about an important period of Christianity, which was banned until the fourth century.
"Normally, we have from this period in our region historical evidence from literature, not archaeological evidence," he said. "There is no structure you can compare it to. It is a very unique find."
Channel Two television, which first reported the story, broadcast pictures of a detailed and well-preserved mosaic bearing the name of Jesus Christ in ancient Greek and images of fish.
Pietro Sambi, the Vatican's ambassador to Israel, praised the find as a "great discovery."
…Joe Zias, an anthropologist and a former curator with the Israeli Antiquities Authorities, said the discovery was significant but unlikely to be the world's oldest church. He said Christianity was outlawed until the time of Emperor Constantine in the fourth century, and there were no churches before then…
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/11/05/AR2005110501017.html
Small-car interest falls with gas prices
…or maybe the press blew it all out of proportion to begin with…everyone complains about the weather but no one does anything about it…
Sat Nov 5, The pain of $3 gasoline is only a month old, but rapidly falling fuel prices seem to have made Americans less interested in fuel economy.
...several measures show waning enthusiasm for fuel-sipping...
Among the signs that conservation is less important than it was a month ago:
• Gasoline consumption the past four weeks was just 1.7% lower than it was a year earlier, according to the U.S. Energy Information Administration. It had been down as much as 2.8% after Hurricane Katrina disrupted energy operations in the Gulf of Mexico and sent gasoline prices to a nationwide average peak of about $3.07.
• Three popular Internet car-shopping sites report notable drops in users seeking information on gas-electric hybrids and other fuel-efficient cars.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/usatoday/20051105/tc_usatoday/smallcarinterestfallswithgasprices
American Civil Liberties Union goes to court in defense of the right to pray
November 5, 2005 ...Would anyone have ever believed that the American Civil Liberties Union would go to court in defense of the right to pray – with invocations at a meeting of county supervisors?
...the usually anti-religion ACLU, went all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court – on behalf of a self-identified witch named Cyndi Simpson.
Simpson is a Wiccan priestess and member of the Broom Riders Association. She wanted to offer a generalized prayer to "the Creator of the Universe" at a meeting of the county supervisors of Chesterfield County, near Richmond, Va.
With help from the ACLU, which ironically often opposes most expressions of prayer at government events, Simpson sued and initially won before a federal court judge who ruled the county board violated Simpson's constitutional right of equal and free expression of her religious beliefs.
...The Supreme Court support of the right of Chesterfield county supervisors to allow invocations from religious leaders – but not from witches – is a wise and justified decision.
Otherwise, can we imagine the lineup of different invocations?
If witches, why not invocations to trolls, gnomes, goblins, hobgoblins, fairies, or any and all of the Greek, Roman and Norse gods and goddesses?
And, there are in existence worshippers of the devil. What about Chesterfield county supervisors hosting invocations to Satan?
~~~~~~~
Eccentric genius Einstein, smoked cigarette butts picked up off street
11/6/05 An insight into the eccentric life of Albert Einstein has been provided in a letter written by his favourite grandson...Bernhard Caesar Einstein, 75, who has never previously spoken about his relative, has recounted a string of anecdotes about the often bizarre life of the 20th century's greatest scientist.
…At one point, the younger Mr Einstein recalled, his grandfather resorted to collecting cigarette butts from the streets to circumvent his doctor's effort to stop him from smoking…
http://news.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2005/11/06/weins06.xml
Faulty Poll Faults Alito's Abortion Stance
Nov. 5, 2005 A new Gallup poll claims to have found that Americans won't support Judge Samuel Alito for confirmation to the Supreme Court if it becomes clear he'll be the fifth vote to overturn Roe v Wade...but a close check of Gallup's methodology suggests the poll's conclusions should be taken with a grain of salt...the survey's fine print notes that the results are based on telephone interviews with 603 adults nationwide, aged 18 and older.
Surveys of "adults" are notorious for yielding more liberal results than surveys of "registered voters." Surveys of "likely voters" tend to trend more conservative still - and are considered the most accurate predictors of election results…Since non-voting "adults" have opted out of the political process, they're really irrelevant. Their presence in any poll is likely to distort its findings - almost always in favor of the liberal candidate or issue at hand.
...Maybe that's why Gallup's survey also finds that a full 50 percent of "adults" surveyed would back a Democrat filibuster of Alito. We're guessing that an even higher percentage of non-voters in the poll's sample would support such a move.
http://newsmax.com/archives/ic/2005/11/5/120714.shtml
Archaeologists Discover Ancient Church
November 5, 2005 JERUSALEM -- Israeli archaeologists said Saturday they have discovered what may be the oldest Christian church in the Holy Land on the grounds of a prison near the biblical site of Armageddon.
The Israeli Antiquities Authority said the ruins are believed to date back to the third or fourth centuries and include references to Jesus and images of fish, an ancient Christian symbol.
"This is a very ancient structure, maybe the oldest in our area," said Yotam Tepper, the head archaeologist on the dig.
…Tepper said the discovery could reveal more about an important period of Christianity, which was banned until the fourth century.
"Normally, we have from this period in our region historical evidence from literature, not archaeological evidence," he said. "There is no structure you can compare it to. It is a very unique find."
Channel Two television, which first reported the story, broadcast pictures of a detailed and well-preserved mosaic bearing the name of Jesus Christ in ancient Greek and images of fish.
Pietro Sambi, the Vatican's ambassador to Israel, praised the find as a "great discovery."
…Joe Zias, an anthropologist and a former curator with the Israeli Antiquities Authorities, said the discovery was significant but unlikely to be the world's oldest church. He said Christianity was outlawed until the time of Emperor Constantine in the fourth century, and there were no churches before then…
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/11/05/AR2005110501017.html
Small-car interest falls with gas prices
…or maybe the press blew it all out of proportion to begin with…everyone complains about the weather but no one does anything about it…
Sat Nov 5, The pain of $3 gasoline is only a month old, but rapidly falling fuel prices seem to have made Americans less interested in fuel economy.
...several measures show waning enthusiasm for fuel-sipping...
Among the signs that conservation is less important than it was a month ago:
• Gasoline consumption the past four weeks was just 1.7% lower than it was a year earlier, according to the U.S. Energy Information Administration. It had been down as much as 2.8% after Hurricane Katrina disrupted energy operations in the Gulf of Mexico and sent gasoline prices to a nationwide average peak of about $3.07.
• Three popular Internet car-shopping sites report notable drops in users seeking information on gas-electric hybrids and other fuel-efficient cars.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/usatoday/20051105/tc_usatoday/smallcarinterestfallswithgasprices
American Civil Liberties Union goes to court in defense of the right to pray
November 5, 2005 ...Would anyone have ever believed that the American Civil Liberties Union would go to court in defense of the right to pray – with invocations at a meeting of county supervisors?
...the usually anti-religion ACLU, went all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court – on behalf of a self-identified witch named Cyndi Simpson.
Simpson is a Wiccan priestess and member of the Broom Riders Association. She wanted to offer a generalized prayer to "the Creator of the Universe" at a meeting of the county supervisors of Chesterfield County, near Richmond, Va.
With help from the ACLU, which ironically often opposes most expressions of prayer at government events, Simpson sued and initially won before a federal court judge who ruled the county board violated Simpson's constitutional right of equal and free expression of her religious beliefs.
...The Supreme Court support of the right of Chesterfield county supervisors to allow invocations from religious leaders – but not from witches – is a wise and justified decision.
Otherwise, can we imagine the lineup of different invocations?
If witches, why not invocations to trolls, gnomes, goblins, hobgoblins, fairies, or any and all of the Greek, Roman and Norse gods and goddesses?
And, there are in existence worshippers of the devil. What about Chesterfield county supervisors hosting invocations to Satan?
…The legal precedent covering most government assemblies is the 1983 Supreme Court case of Marsh v. Chambers, where justices noted:
“In light of the unambiguous and unbroken history of more than 200 years, there can be no doubt that the practice of opening legislative sessions with prayer has become part of the fabric of our society. To invoke Divine guidance on a public body entrusted with making the laws is not, in these circumstances, an "establishment" of religion or a step toward establishment; it is simply a tolerable acknowledgment of beliefs widely held among the people of this country. As Justice Douglas observed, "[w]e are a religious people whose institutions presuppose a Supreme Being."
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=47228
posted by David Bennett | 1:00 AM
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